Objects in Mirror are Closer than they Appear

What happens when things go wrong? Ouch. In assigning responsibility for less than ideal results, some look toward others and some look at themselves. As Jim Collins describes in “Good to Great” regarding the highest levels of leadership, “Level 5 leaders, inherently humble, look out the window to apportion credit—even undue credit—to factors outside themselves. If they can’t find a specific person or event to give credit to, they credit good luck. At the same time, they look in the mirror to assign responsibility, never citing bad luck or external factors when things go poorly.” Reportedly, underperforming leaders use the window and the mirror in the opposite manner.

I like Collins’ metaphor generally, except the part about crediting “good luck” for good works, or any luck at all. While humility is great (or at least good), modeling how to share (and receive) credit appropriately is probably great(er). Sharing responsibility is also a good idea, although some of us nearly always believe that somehow if things didn’t go well, we are responsible; perhaps not responsible for a particular event that contributed to a poor outcome, but responsible because we believe we could have done something that would have ensured a successful outcome. We may not have any idea what our contribution might have been, yet we still believe that we should have been able to bring home the prize, trophy, or other sports-like symbol of winning.

Confidence or arrogance? Well, it depends…sort of a thin line here. Perhaps it’s attitudinal. When we look for solutions to correct the aforementioned poor outcomes, problems, issues, conundrums, and other perplexities, intuitively we know that we don’t know it all and we must look to others for answers and knowledge. Well, unless we believe we do know it all I suppose. Okay, so maybe now we’re getting to the attitudinal difference that defines confidence and arrogance.

Sidebar: I once had some colleagues return from a workshop where personality/work traits were analyzed for the participants (and their bosses back in the office just for fun); they were happy to report that they had defined me to be a “know-it-all”…okay. The good news was that there were two kinds of know-it-alls – the real know-it-all and the fake know-it-all – and I was a real know-it-all. I beamed with pride…eventually.

I would suggest that confidence is outwardly focused and arrogance is inwardly focused. While we can certainly be confident in ourselves (self-confidence is admirable), arrogance is all about oneself (self-arrogance is redundant). We can also have confidence in others – looking for knowledge elsewhere and generously applying credit for that knowledge. Conversely we can’t learn anything if we arrogantly know it all already – knowing it all and taking credit whenever possible.

So, learn to share credit, including receiving it if you don’t already. Learn to share responsibility, including accepting it if you don’t already. Don’t be a know-it-all (real or fake) – you’ll learn more. Do look to others for knowledge – you’ll be wiser. How? Look in the mirror – that answer is closer than it appears.